What is the difference between negotiation and bargaining

I was invited to the conference by the great folks over at GetAccept. Bargaining is a discussion about what the other side wants. Negotiation is a discussion about why they want it. You cannot fully engage the other side in a discussion about what they want until you understand why they want it. First, the participants were asked if they could described the difference bargaining and negotiating.

Most, not surprisingly, defined them both as the same. Next, they were told imagine me as a bank robber. I have no gainful employment. It is what I do to survive and I am good at it. More recently, I attended a seminar on negotiation led by management consultant Jack Kaine.

He focused on negotiation for entrepreneurs, making a big distinction between bargaining and negotiation. I was caught off guard and drawn in at the same time.

Not at all. Something about this distinction really sank in for me, and I found myself using it almost immediately without realizing it. To truly engage in a negotiation, you must have trust and openness between the parties. Otherwise, it is impossible to find the common win-win.

When I found myself in a conversation with a bargainer who was trying to nickel-and-dime some services that had been requested by his more win-win-minded colleagues, I went off-script and asked what he really needed. I agreed with him that I was asking for a lot of money, and asked him what he wanted me to eliminate from the scope of work.

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Whether you're aware of it or not, you've been negotiating your whole life.